Coping with Bi-Polar WAW

[CountingCrows]

W came over a bit late this morning. I only had about 10 minutes before I needed to go to work. I got a paycheck stub from her so I could visit a bankruptcy lawyer today for initial consult. Was quite surprised to see that she had only worked 19 hours the week after Thanksgiving. Surprised. because she has gone on about how hard she's working to make ends meet, when it appears that she's barely working a part-time job. Seems to me that W needs to get off her @ss and find a REAL job.

I started to leave after about 5 minutes of friendly chat with her, and she asked me if she could have just 5 more minutes with me. I agreed. She was complaining about her roommate, mostly. W also made a comment that I'm sure she wasn't saying maliciously, but it made me flinch internally. She was talking about how she had to go outside to smoke at the apartment (same as our house), but that early in the week, she's allowed to smoke in "her" room. She said she's glad she got a "bedside smoker" (actually not sure what that is). She said she had called up to the "shop" and asked if they had them. When she mentions the "shop", she means the head shop that OM works at. Which means that not only is she still talking with OM, but still seeing him at least at his work. OM's "shop" also has bad connotations for me, because it was in a room upstairs in the "shop" where the initial PA occurred. Makes me sick to my stomach every time I pass by the place...and it's right across the street from the church where S7 has his Cub Scout meetings.

I know in W's mind, she isn't doing anything wrong, as he's "just a friend". But in my mind, it was very disrespectful to mention her contact with him, even non-directly. Part of me also thinks that she was feeling me out and said it just to see if I'd react.

I didn't say anything at all, just let her keep talking for about 2 more minutes and stood up to leave. She asked me for a hug, I complied and left for work.

This morning, I've been fighting the urge to send her a text telling her that I feel that bringing up "the shop" was really disrespectful. But I've resisted that urge. I doubt that I'll bite my tongue if she ever brings it up again in future conversation, though.