I am definitely going to go check out those threads Grace mentioned. I saw them on KJ's thread but was unable to check them out then.
Hi,Cat! Good to see you!
Okay, so things here are interesting. I have definitely seen many things lately that are "positives" yet really have been at this long enough to know not to get excited. My H is so much better with the kids now that he has been for most of the past year and for that I am so grateful. There are some positives with me too but definitely not the way he is connecting with the kids. He is definitely "here" more, both physically and mentally but at the same time seems more withdrawn, if that makes any sense.
He still seems to be trying to maintain that illusion of "control" in his life (like still not wanting to tell me much) which has so obviously spun out of control. Some of his bad financial decisions over the past year are starting to hit the fan and I am worried because it will directly affect me and the kids but am trying to just trust God to provide me with a new job or whatever when the time comes. He actually seems to be trying to take some responsibility for it now, though, which is a change. We'll see.
Sometimes it seems like he is processing like crazy, but it is up to him to decide what to do about it.
He looks so much more like himself, having gained back a good portion of the weight he lost on his MLC diet about a year ago. (I on the other hand have managed to keep off the 20 pounds I lost on my MLC diet!). He sleeps way more now, but doesn't seem to ever sleep well. He is always tired and doesn't look good.
Things are different now. He is cycling through different things and maybe, just maybe starting to realize stuff. I am different now. I am not offering help/support/whatever for anything, even this financial stuff. I have finally set a boundary and told him it is his responsibility. That is a total 180 for the way I have been pretty much our whole marriage. IF he wants to come to me and ask for help, I will be happy to help him but as long as he chooses to not treat me like a wife I won't offer that support.
