Not much new to report. Guess that is a good thing. Exh is still calling and texting alot. Not a big deal. Sometimes, depending on what its about, I wait a bit before responding. He clearly does not like that though. Last night he sent a text saying goodnight to baby and I. Well, baby and I were having issues going to bed so I didn't answer him for an hour. He sent the text two more times and then said Hello? I don't wear my phone on my hip! I just replied goodnight!
While he was here for his visit last night my son was also here. He and exh's d15 were texting back and forth about stuff. I know I can't wonder, but I do wonder what goes thru exh's head about what was lost besides a M. These kids were close. I bet he never thought of the kids or W while he was drinking and getting an ego stroke by OW. I know, not for me to wonder.
Super busy day. Two home matches in a row.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Exh wants to go in on the gifts for baby. Fine by me if he gives me the money. I went crazy on her this year. It was so easy. He thinks it would be nice to give gifts from Mommy and Daddy. I haven't put names on her gifts yet. He said he will bring the money today.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Now I am trying to figure out how to creatively wrap my other kids gifts: Window tint on their cars/truck.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Wow..he stopped by and gave me cash for baby's presents. He asked if we wanted to go shopping with him tonight, but we can't. Son has wrestling match. I just told him we couldn't and thanks for asking.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
That is good that he stopped by to give you money to help out with Christmas for the baby.
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While he was here for his visit last night my son was also here. He and exh's d15 were texting back and forth about stuff. I know I can't wonder, but I do wonder what goes thru exh's head about what was lost besides a M. These kids were close. I bet he never thought of the kids or W while he was drinking and getting an ego stroke by OW. I know, not for me to wonder.
D affects more than just the 2 people involved. It usually affects a number of people. I don't blame you for wondering. It is probably hard not to. But you are doing well. You are taking care of your kids and being there for them. He seems to be showing some signs of softening. Probably a little early to be sure though.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
He may be softening...but ?why? is the big question. Way too early to tell. I have been peeking at emails and there hasn't been anything from MGF until last night. She sent him a message saying she liked his new profile pic on FB..that he looks at peace and that she hopes he is doing well. He didn't respond. Knowing him, he may feel like this is where he wants to be, but it never lasts. One hint of trouble and he runs.
Although he is looking way hotter to me these days. When I hate him he looks less appealing.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Although he is looking way hotter to me these days. When I hate him he looks less appealing.
lol. I know the feeling to some extent. Although I can't say as though I am not ready, willing, and able at a moments notice should W by some miracle put the offer out there. lol.
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He may be softening...but ?why? is the big question. Way too early to tell.
It is to early to tell. Maybe between the baby and the Christmas holidays it is having some effect. Up until last night and today, my W was being a lot nicer. It could be the season that softens people.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
you gotta stay as strong as you possibly can. do not, do anything physical. You could really help change this man, but you've got to teach him by action, or lack of action that is. lol
this is good that he is in this spot. you just keep doing what your doing. and remember don't expect ANYTHING!
so glad to hear he brought over money...just keep encouraging the good things he does.
what is his 5LLs? when he does good things, that is the time to use those top 5LLs...unless it's ml. your not allowed to do that. says me.
and fyi, try not to snoop too much. I would have to say, when he is being consistent with his actions with you, is when he is not in much contact with OW...but it's when he is up and down, and not around that he IS with OWs. So, it's not really necessary to snoop right now. cause even if he doesn't have any emails you still need to let him prove to you for a year that he has changed. so snooping right now doesn't really matter much.
right?
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I know...hands to myself. Much easier to do when he was being a jerk. He could revert back to jerk at any moment so I am not worried
Tonight he invited us to Xmas Day at his sisters. I told him we would go. My family always does Xmas Eve so Xmas Day is not busy at all. I know he just wants baby there but I am part of the package. This time the family that enable him will be there. They think he hasn't done anything wrong. Not looking forward to this one but oh well....we will make it.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Its just some of the guests that will be there. One specific couple (BIL and SIL)that complained and complained to me about exh's drinking and his drinking and driving. Then after the DUI, they thought I completely betrayed him. Always felt that our relationship issues caused exh to drink. But then again they are 30 year old party animals themselves. Always going out and coming home intoxicated...but they say they can handle it. I will most likely go, put on the same face I did at Tgiving, and show them i am one happy person!
I think my S16 and exhs d15 are trying to get us back together. I saw d15 at the wrestling match and she begged me to call exh to see if he could come. I didn't. Then last night I saw them chatting on FB as I walked by but then he hid it really quick. After S16 asked if I minded if he called exh to invite him to tonights match. I said it was up to him, but be ready for a no.
School is out in 2 days. Not that it means a full house when you have teens anyway. 2 small boyfriend gifts to get and I am done shopping.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
