@ST: Are you sure you're only 33? You're wiser than your age.
@ST: About my sitch, don't sweat it. There isn't much info in it... more like my ranting. Truth is I'm kinda wary of updating it. That one sentence path I gave you earlier is where I've gotten the ball rolling, so not much 'action' on my thread until the past week.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
The path I'm going following is completely different. Follow the route you were on before:
Originally Posted By: Mindfull
OK, goal for VERY EARLY 2010~MAKE THAT DAM* H SCURRY!
I don't know why M, but for some reason I don't get the feeling that there is an OW involved in your sitch. At least not right now. I wanted to sit down and dissect my "thesis" on reasons why for you but have gotten caught up in my own sitch. I'm just telling you what my gut is saying based on the feedback you've provided.
You're one gutsy gal. Play your cards right. I'd recommend a simultaneous path for you after surgery: - Dig to clarify your suspicions - Work on seducing him
One more note... while working on seducing him you do NOT give in to ML -- as much as you want to. He has to work for it. Make yourself attractive and play a little hard to get.. then let him do a bit of work to try conquer you. HE WILL VALUE IT.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
oh, G, who was the WAS and LBS? for some reason I'm recalling you were actually the WAS.
Mind, I agree with not doing ML...yet. I do remember doing that a couple times and I wished I hadn't gone that far, but because he was still in contact with the OW. If your H truly doesn't have an OW, and I agree with G on that too, then IMHO, I think if it really goes that far, well, Michelle does tell us that is a good thing...unless the sitch becomes stagnated, but I think what G said will have the best impact.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I was WAH "incognito" about 2 years ago. I never told her because I had issues to sort out. I needed to clear my mind because I was unhappy. I did the work on myself. I realized I wasn't communicating correctly and fixed it to the best of my ability at the time. You could say that my "fog" lasted approximately 6-8 weeks. My mind cleared and I worked on the M.
Just shy of seven months ago I was handed the bomb and she became WAS and I LBS.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
wow. I've never heard of a story like that. Well, it is good that you have been thru it, and you can understand both sides of the story, like I can. I'm sorry that you are now the LBS, but you are the wiser one, and I'm certain you can save yours as well.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
This is PRIME! (While sitting on the bleachers at bball game this evening, IN EAR SHOT of my parents, my favorite bball players DAD (who thinks I'm cooler than the North Pole), AND my BFF) H: "I just checked our CC bill on the phone, as D18 wanted to do something w/her schoolbooks. What's the charge for Naughty but Nice?" ME: "Gee, H, can't I buy myself something for xmas, too?" WINK
Favorite bball players DAD almost choked on his popcorn. My DEAFISH Dad, says to my H, "WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY?" The BFF says, "Who needs Santa?"
LOLLOOOOLLL
G, if you're out there... THAT was good!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
G... I knew you would get a kick out of that! He was just a bit stunned, and didn't reply, as everyone else did. It was funny because when he started to ask me when it was loud, and then quiet... Not so sure he knew it would come out for all to hear! Hahhah
So, (Britt will love this...). I've had FOUR compliments from varying ages of men today... On... My... Hat! LOL. Its a black wool bucket hat, w/a big black button on the side. Its -1 here, so I've got a short mink coat on w/jeans and tall black boots! It feels fab! Going' to lunch w/the girlfriends!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Ha ha! You in girl! Love it. Dont hate cause we are in style! My hat is A nice brown knitted hat. It looks great with my brown Uggs. Make sure you be sure to Flounce today!
M: 31 H: 29 Married: 6 yrs Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old
Separated: Sept. '09 Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09 Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10 Threatening to leave again: July,14
