how come everyone here thinks when filing it's not the end...I so see the end when it comes to filing
I'm with Puppy. I really didn't start DBing until I got served. It's a pretty big 2x4 So I knew I had a year to make it work or else. Made my mind up I was going to thrive either way.
Everything about our marriage is better now. It's mind boggling.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I filed, we never divorced, and I haven't been happier in over 15 years.
Lots of things can still happen, O.
Puppy
What Puppy said, except it was luvless asking.
Divorce is a process. Filing the paperwork does not magically dissolve the relationship; in fact, it's going to become a long and drawn-out process.
Luvless has kids, which means there is going to be discussion of custody and visitation, child support. Do either of you own a business or other major assets? That's going to have to get straightened out.
Your husband will be looking at all of this and realizing that YOUR MARRIAGE IS ENDING. There will be no more "the two of you" or "us". He will have his space, and his money, and have to juggle visitation and weekends with the kids.
Meanwhile, here you are looking great, loving your kids... maybe this isn't such a good idea. Would luvless still be willing to talk about working it out?
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Yes there is a business, we have already decided on the splits of assets and child custody and we are going into the same attorney because we agreed not to contest each other and to fair splits on everything.
This is only about a 60 day process here.
M43 W43 D11 S7 M18 T20 WAW is back & trying (no she was lying) Close to callin' it busted but.... watching Whatever the outcome - It was a choice.
Whoops, that was a minor thread hijack to luvless. Sorry for the confusion.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Yes there is a business, we have already decided on the splits of assets and child custody and we are going into the same attorney because we agreed not to contest each other and to fair splits on everything.
BZZZZT! Why are you two using the same lawyer for a divorce???
That would be like asking the DA to prosecute and defend the same person.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
So I knew I had a year to make it work or else. Made my mind up I was going to thrive either way. 