Kalni: Gnosis, sometimes we act anyway possible just to get out of limbo, status quo, stagnation.
Yes, hence my current path.
Kalni: You know best what's going on in your head, but since it took you 2 years to come back to the M, why is 7 months unacceptable?
I posted this elsewhere today: I was WAH "incognito" about 2 years ago. I never told her because I had issues to sort out. I needed to clear my mind because I was unhappy. I did the work on myself. I realized I wasn't communicating correctly and fixed it to the best of my ability at the time. You could say that my "fog" lasted approximately 6-8 weeks. My mind cleared and I worked on the M. Just shy of seven months ago I was handed the bomb and the roles switched.
Kalni: Out of curiosity and with the risk of having missed something important in your sitch since I havent followed your threads from the beginning...
No problem K. My threads are scant... I'm an extremely private individual. I don't like talking about myself. Believe me, posting my sitch up here is completely against my nature, and not easy to do. There are only two people on the planet that can claim "really know me." One of them is Mrs Gno. She has been my closest friend and confidant.
Kalni: Calm down, identify your goal. The desirable goal, not the "approachable" goal.
My goal: I have a faithful partner on board willing to work on us and with me through the next decade and more. I'm prepared to put in more work under those circumstances. Anything less is not acceptable.
I realize that in recent days my posts appear to be irrational, emotional or out of control. The weird thing once I pushed the button I'm completely calm. I'm so detached that I feel like an observer of a chess match in play.
I have my internal deadline. I know how to push my wife's buttons. She has grown complacent and thinks she can continue indefinitely. We are in stalemate. The only option left is to shake the tree, create CRISIS and see where she stands.
Kalni: We usually go for the easy way out confusing it with progress while all we want is to just see a change of some sorts. Limbo is nerve wrecking. Absolutely! Limbo, stalemate, purgatory... whatever you call it is psychological torture. For me, this lasts until it becomes so uncomfortable you cannot live in it anymore. This is the stage I'm at now. I know what I want, if I can't have it then I'll move on without it.
Kalni: You know if your M is worth it. It is. If it wasn't I wouldn't bother with all the effort I've put in.
Kalni: PS CC charges didnt say "BoB", it's just said "be cheeky" or something similar... VS is VS, he can imagine all he wants. Good luck K. God knows you deserve it.
I'm an extremely private individual. I don't like talking about myself. Believe me, posting my sitch up here is completely against my nature, and not easy to do. There are only two people on the planet that can claim "really know me." One of them is Mrs Gno. She has been my closest friend and confidant.
And perhaps what you've done here is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself and continue to do? Perhaps, that bottling everything up with limited exit route is waht got you here in the first place? I'm guilty of that as well.
Me 35/XW 33 S13 & S12 M: 10/17/98 OM & S: 07/08 D final 06/09/09 12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing" 06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10 06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
And perhaps what you've done here is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself and continue to do? Perhaps, that bottling everything up with limited exit route is waht got you here in the first place? I'm guilty of that as well.
Thanks Dday. Keep swinging those 2x4's. Posting here is a double-edged sword too... especially choosing the right words to communicate the specific point without misunderstandings (referring to the 180/GAL one earlier on today)
No problem brother, i guess some of us, the one's who aren't used to communicating openly, have problems getting things out in a way everybody interprets the same.
Me 35/XW 33 S13 & S12 M: 10/17/98 OM & S: 07/08 D final 06/09/09 12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing" 06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10 06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
It looks like the adrenaline rush from getting something going is starting to wear off. I feel saddened that it has come to me traveling down this path. I've been out of the house most of the day, doing my stuff from my laptop in coffee shops.
I bought a cellphone today. I've never needed one here before because I'd always be in the apartment. Thus the die is cast and we move onto the next stage 2 (2nd stanza or whatever of my theme song (Major Tom))
watching in a trance the crew is certain nothing left to chance all is working trying to relax up in the capsule "send me up a drink" jokes Major Tom the count goes on 4 3 2 1...
Tonight I'm too fatigued to go out and "play" so I'm headed to bed for an early night.
Thank you to those of you who provided feedback on combating hate. I have read your posts and am busy digesting.
Dudess thanks too for your feedback. Your response is also in the queue. You asked many valid questions and one word answers would not suffice.
