Calling out the Piecers

[dday101798]

Sorry puppy, call it the WAS instilled in me? Call it the 180's?

More so the 180's. When I was packing things up for XW after she left, I came across a ton of notes from when we had started dating back in '97. To my dismay, a lot of them were chocked full of apologies for arguements we had gotten in to. Most silly for the most part, but all had one common sentence in each and every one of them: "we're both stuborn and bull-headed".

What dismayed me? Simple, that stubborn and bull-headed person I was that was half the founding source to forge a relationship, a marriage and family...............

Became a wuss.

A TV iconic, Al Bundy "yes dear", "I'll do this for you, so long as you're happy and the cost is I'm miserable" type mentality.

And where did it get me?

Friendless, drinking, depressed, losing nearly every worldly possession, in counciling, all essentially family-less and most of all DIVORCED and left behind while the one I layed over to appease ran off with someone else.

So suffice it to say, that stubborn and bull headed me came walking along and saw the pathetic wuss of a "man" laying there, sobbing, picked him up, brushed off his coat, while chuckling, 'look at you man, you need me'.

Thus again, I'm sorry, but seriously, if she thinks she's getting the plain old wussy me I let myself become, she's got another thing coming. Being that person, I lost her and my dignity. Being the person that DB'ing reminded me of who I was and to be again, FOR ME, may lose her again (or strike her fancy), but NOT my dignity.