how to 180 when you've been too independent?

[avermont]

[/quote]I am feeling total roller-coaster about sending such a cold reply to the his friendly bill-paying note. He had added in other little bits of news. And I just responded with "bills paid. All OK. Review bills with me if you want."

So that's the conflict! Respond to friendly with friendly, and then it is just as cutterbug described: X gets to sit back, life is good, Avermont is fine, la la la...

Or WHAT IF--and I know I get a 2x4 for this--his friendly little email was a reaching out? [quote]

Back to the bill paying question--the big event is tomorrow night!

I had broken NC with a little email story. He responded very friendly, some news, asked about bills.

I replied very shortly that bills were OK, could review them this week if he wanted.

Later followed up with the suggestion that we meet at a local library for a "neutral space." No answer.

Just now he responded with the tersest: Fine. Thursday. Library. 5:30.

So...just to juggle up the waters, I wrote back a big OK! and signed my full name.

I don't know what that was really about, other than--well to be honest--f**ing with his head. I send a friendly note; he sends a friendly note; I respond with basic info and a suggestion; he responds icy cold. So I bounce back with cheer.
I didn't think he would take well to the suggestion that we handle our mutual finances away from our mutual home, but it makes it a little less likely he will make the situation as uncomfortable as he did last time.

So...taking my own roller coaster and dumping it on him? or just trying different things? remember, we are almost totally NC so I don't have much opportunity to try things and see how they work.

Am I just being a jerk?