I've followed your thread, and I sympathize with what you're going through.
When my W was flauting her A with OM in front of me, and I had to try to keep things civil for the sake of our three little kids, I found it very useful to go someplace private and let my anger out. Scream, smash things, whatever you have to do. Just get it OUT, and don't stop until you feel it subside. I found that it would come in waves. I'd think it was exhausted, then a few hours later another wave would come. Don't fight it, and don't try to keep it in. Go someplace you feel safe and private, and let it all out. I was shocked when I realized I hadn't had a primal emotional expression like that since I was a young child.
And definitely cry as much as you need, and whenever you need.
