Q&A catchup and response - Part 2

I needed to go out to do some serious shopping. You're looking at the proud owner of a new jacked up summer wardrobe.

Mindfull: Did W try to call your cell while you were out on Fri evening?
M, I don't have a cell phone. shocked I have no need for one. All my communication is done via the internet - voice, chat, emails. I'm glued to the seat in my office about 12-14 hours a day / 7 days a week. All my contacts are international.

Mindfull: On the voice recorder... What was her anger/hate about?
From the snatches of convo I managed to clean up it was all about moi...

Mindfull: what you mean by... My W DB'd me good on Thursday
Went out looking like a million bucks and disappeared inexplicably for hours... being mysterious and drive my imagination wild. Sort of like GAL and do things for you... i.e. manicure and visit older SIL (3X divorced and lives with the parents)


dday101798: You are on the right track, but a bit to the extreme in nature.
I hear you dday. And yes, its going to be extreme because I've become extremely frustrated.

- 180's have not worked.
- Patience and understanding have not worked.
- Communication has not worked.
- Love languages have been met with below mediocre results.
- Getting busy with my life has not worked.
- Going dark has not worked.
- Going dark / NC near the beginning did not work.

So... it's time to change and use the only last resort I have.

dday101798: You did so by going out on your own and giving her a "does of her own medicine", and as you note, she didn't like it. And THAT is exactly what I'd keep doing.
Message acknowledged. Increasing velocity.

dday101798: In the mean time, she'll want to argue. And I'll bet about the same repeated thing over and over, right? Then prep yourself with the stance: "what is the point?"
Correct. Parameters expected and already incorporated into the master plan. There is no point in processing further.

luvless: It sounds like you have a sense of empowerment (well feeling brave enough) to call her out on a D.
Luv, I've been prepping for this. The empowerment has been there for a long time. I've just been holding off in hopes of things changing and a thawing of the ice. The cycle has been repeating too long. It's time for a change in dynamic.

motherof3: Is it possible that you are looking for evidence of something or someone that doesn't even exist?
Thanks mo3. Yes, it is very possible. I have taken this into consideration. Should the opportunity present itself in the future full transparency will be on my list of demands (and it will be reciprocal)

Coach: When you fly you are taught to cross-check your decision-making with multiple different instruments. Flying by the seat of your pants can get you in trouble especially when encountering bad weather.
Thanks Coach. As events unfold I'd appreciate yours and Greek's feedback. See below about the flying...

Mindfull: What's the next step in surveillance?
I'm tired of that game, so none for now. I have other things I need to take care of. If I have free time I might resume.

Mindfull: You need proof, either way, though. Don't F it all up w/anger and hate yet.
iwantittowork: watch that you are not doing this from a place of spite and anger, and your ready to live with the consequences, regardless of what they are.

Thank you all for your concern. On re-reading this morning
s post, yes it sounds full of anger. I'd like to reassure you it's not. What you are reading is EXTREME frustration and exasperation. The plan I'm following was drafted when I was in a more analytical, cool headed state of mind. I last revised it about a week ago. All I was doing was waiting for a catalyst.

It has been calculated and its design is to create maximum CRISIS over the next week. I HAVE evaluated the risks and the odds are sitting at 50/50. The way I read her is that she is way beyond emotionally checked out. I've been left with no other option and have nothing left to lose.

Britt54: Question. You mentioned that your W did not like when you were not there friday night.
Sweetie your question did not go unnoticed. I will come back to it. I'm pretty much in a hurry and would need to think about it.

Questions about Mrs Gno's hate
Luvless, Dudess, Wholeagain, Mindfull and anyone I may have missed. Thanks for your feedback and questioning regarding her hate. You've given me some food for thought. To answer them I probably need to write a long, separate post. I will get back to everyone on that.

I hope everyone will excuse me for not being able to catch up on your situations today. It's been busy to say the least. I'm on my way out the door and will return in the early hours of the morning.

Thanks for taking your precious time to respond. Hugs.