For those with a WAS...How do you cope?

[courts0818]

Anyone know if that cell phone spyware really works - cause right now I don't care if it seems deceitful, I want answers.

If it works on a BB, I'll download it right now.

[luvless]

what kind of cell you have? mobile spy for iphone is good

I've heard good things about the cell spyware - get a good one!

oh duh you said you have a blackberry

[courts0818]

I have a Verizon EnV. I want to spy on H's cell which is a Blackberry. It's new and from his work so I don't know much about it. It's this one: BlackBerry® Tour™ 9630 smartphone

[bluerain]

Call the hotel and tell them that the stay at the hotel was for a work search, and you are doing your taxes. Ask if they can send you the invoice from the hotel stay because you want to claim it and have misplaced the original. Im not sure how it works when they send out invites about those kinds of things. If its a small hotel, or a resort type of thing, they might systematically send things like that out to thier guest lists.

Im sorry, but I hope that its just one of those things that there is a perfectly good explaination. You knew that he was up to something, so its not that big of a surprise, who knows, maybe he just drank himself silly and had to stay there for the night.

Really, you are supposed to be detaching, so you need to try to let this go. Document, it, but dont focus on it and let it consume you. Just when we are doing so well, these things come and punch us in the stomach. Remember how you go to this point, and work hard to get back there.

Courtney, you have been doing so well, you are going to be fine. Yes, this is a set back, but you know how to rise above it.

((((Courtney))))

[luvless]

I would put one on my H in a second but it's a gov't issued blackberry so no way I can put spyware on there without detection!

[courts0818]

Bluerain,
I'm doing okay. I'm not going to do anything for at least 24-48 hours. I've learned from past mistakes to not act on my emotions. H and I have had no contact today - which is good bc that decreased the likelihood of me reacting poorly.

Really what I'm more upset about is that I let this get to me tonight - meaning that I found myself short on patience with DD. After she dropped a camera on my toe (ouch), dumped a big bowl of water all over the floor and would not stay out of my work stuff - I found myself getting grumpy. Ugh. I do my best to not let any of this affect her, but sometimes I have some bad moments - and they are usually due to something H has done or said. Although, that's an excuse and I need to do better. It just gets hard doing everything on my own.

And it's a catch 22 - I want/need to detach and I've been doing awesome. Yet, I want answers. I feel like "answers" are going to give me the ultimate push to enforce some strict boundaries with H.

Anyway, I absolutley have things to be thankful for so I'm going to think about them. For today...
1. I found a couple of accessories for DD for Christmas at 70% off. woo hoo! She's going to have such a FUN little playset and I got such great deals.
2. For my job - I spend a lot of time working with middle school and high school kids and I love it.
3. That even though I felt I was run over by a bulldozer tonight, I did not do something stupid. I just got on here and
journaled.

[Lll54]

Courtney, so did you figure anything out? What's up?

[courts0818]

Hi Britt,
Thanks for checking in. Things have been so busy that I haven't been getting on here. I haven't figured anything out yet. I was totally focused on Christmas and this week I'm babysitting so I haven't had time to look into things.

With the start of the new year, I would like to start with a new approach and new boundaries.

Today is H's birthday - not sure what to do...if anything.

[ClingingToHope]

I remember asking my W if she wanted to see the girls on her birthday. It was a weekend day on my weekend. She said, no, she had plans.

Oooooh, that hurt.

I would not call. If he calls you then say something. My 2 cents.

[soleil]

I do'nt know. I think you could call to wish a happy birthday and keep it short, unless you're not comfortable with it. He'se still your H, after all.

I remember asking my W if she wanted to see the girls on her birthday. It was a weekend day on my weekend. She said, no, she had plans.

Oooooh, that hurt.

Ouch, CTH. That seems so cold