I really think it is up to you to decide what you want, what you can handle, etc etc.
I know reading MWD book, there was a couple that 'reconciled' but I think it was MONTHS before they actually kissed, or exchanged ILYs, or whatever. Can't remember the exact scenario but it was in one of the books. So maybe sometimes things come back together with fireworks and sometimes they come back slowly. I think I have lost my patience with the 'slowly' thing, but only you know if you have it in you to stick it out.
Objectively, I 'read' you writing a lot of positives about your H. I don't know if that is because you want to be with him, because you are trying to talk yourself into wanting it, or if those are the reasons you are hesitant to pull the plug.
I do know that when Dan and I are spending time together, like playing in the snow the other day, there is an impulse to just knock him over in a snowdrift and kiss him. Or reach for him when we are standing close together. But I won't because I know he could not/would not reciprocate. Do you have those desires too, or are they gone for you?
Hmmm.........your situation is very tough for me to wrap my head around...
