#67 Cant find my "pieces"

[june72]

Kalni,
Have been following your thread for months. Often wanted to post- "end it with this man, you deserve better" but have held back.

But today I have to reply to Ali's post.

Ali- forgive me, I am quite angry by what your wrote, but what in the world are you talking about???????

3 years is MORE than enough of this nonsense. He has done NOTHING to work his way back into Kalni's heart.

Ali "let go of it"? "Beat him over the head"? HE HAS BASICALLY TAKEN NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR HIS ACTIONS OR ACTED IN A MANOR AS SUCH.

How many more year's should Kalni wait? And keep trying?

This is ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. How can trust every be regained when he travels all the time. She can never know if he is with someone or not or even if the trip is legitimate.

And you find fault with HER???????

At least that is how I am interpreting it.

She did not win her husband back- he is not there- words only- NOTHING more!!!


Blame, blame??- I think Kalni's husband created this debacle and Kalni has been working for years to fix it and he has done almost nothing!!!


High expectations? Passwords, and ILY, sex? I think these would be the minimum.

Harder for him? He is a big boy and should man up to recovery. If he can't he should man up and divorce her. B/c Limbo land is the worst and cruelest place to be. He has a responsibility also.

In the end a relationship can only work towards recovery when there are two people working towards it. He is doing nothing.

I am very suspicious and think that the A may still be going on or there is an A #2. I recall that he took a lady friend to buy Kalni's purse. Red flags for me.

I do not trust this man and he has shown himself for years to be untrustworthy and STILL shows himself to be untrustworthy!

Maybe he is crazy in love with Kalni but does not know how to show it. There comes a point in time where inaction is actually a choice. His inaction is showing he is not really committed to the marriage.


KALNI DESERVES BETTER THAN THIS!!!!

Kalni do not go back to this man. Divorce him. In my book he would have to do some major things immediately to show that he will fight for the marriage.


You don't just have an affair for three years and pretend that nothing happened. You don't leave your wife and fake reconcile and then have a hard time making an effort for reconciliation.

As Dr. Phil states to the person who was cheating- "you drove this marriage into a ditch- you need to get it out" (the cheater has to do WORK to fix things)

Kalni's husband, in my book- I can't say it- it would probably hurt Kalni's feelings.

I have sit back way to long and watched this woman be hurt. While people mention how she should try harder, think differently, be more forgivning, more accepting. Hell no- he broke it- he can fix it. Enough is enough. I think I would be less ridged in my thinking if there wasn't the fake reconcile.

How in the world do you not know this is fake reconcile #2? Where is the trust? Beyond destroyed.

Few would even consider trying to reconcile after all that has been done. I give her HUGE props for that.