Are you sure that separation and divorce is what you want? It sounds like he could be talked into counseling or Retrouvaille. If you are both planning to stay in the house, shouldn't you make the relationship better?
I don't know what I want. I don't know if I can forgive H.
We just had a very long talk. H got all comfy in his pj's so I knew he was not going anywhere so I decided to go and talk to him.
We talked about: - our low points during the last 4 years - some details of A - 6 months, met at work,OW going thru divorce - H moving downstairs (as I can't force him out) - separation and that I would consider this day 1 - I might never be able to forgive him - if we do work on M, transparency and that he will feel like he is under house arrest with 24/7 surveillance and I would insist on MC - our children And much more.
H broke down and said "how ironic - now after all this you are talking to me".
H told me he took the kids passports and birth cert. I can't believe he would think I would kidnap the kids.
H is surprised how calm I am and that I have not gone into a rage at him. (have occasionally done it but its not my style)
H said A is over. But he will run into OW again at work. I am highly suspicious its over that quickly after H was busted. H said it was ending just before I confronted him.
It now seems like the ball is back in my court if OW is truly out of pic. I need to decide if I want to work on our M or start going our separate ways. I need time to think.
