One day at a time....

[Hope4us]

Hi h4u and Rabbit,
Thanks for your thoughts.
H4U that is very helpful. Just to normalize the experiences, to know someone else felt a similar way, and that it can all be ok... those are the things I need to know right now. I had a "moment" this morning, getting teary about some of the hurt and lies, and H just held me and apologized...again. It was what I needed. We are getting there, I think we will get there. But it is so much harder that I think we both ever thought possible.
Finding the balancing managing our own emotions while processing the R stuff... tough balance sometimes.

Rocked, If your H is being like this already, so soon post A, I think you guys will do ok. There'll be bumps in the road, no doubt, but from what you've posted, he seems to get it. Seems to be saying all the right things. But be careful, once the honeymoon period is over, he'll probably have a lot of stuff to deal with that he's not ready for.

I read one time that what us LBS' don't realize is many times, the WAS has as much or more chit to deal with than us LBS's do. And I think that's true. Not only do they have to deal with their emotions of dealing with the loss of a person that obviously meant a lot to them (so much so that they were willing to throw away their marriage for them) to then dealing with just what they've done to the one person that has stood for them through the worst thing you could possibly do to a person.

Keep working at it. It will get easier. And there will continue to be those triggers for a long time to come, but they get fewer and farther between and less intense as the time goes by.

Hope this helps.