Holiday gifts when separated?

[newton0]

My wife of 5+ years left 2 weeks ago to stay with her mother. We had been having problems on/off for the last two years, during which time, she has mostly been away, caring for her dying father. We had just begun seeing a therapist before she left, but I was simply going through the motions.I thought it would be nice to be intimate, when she told me she didn't see any future in our marriage & she was thinking of leaving (again). I shut down, proceeded to withdraw, got drunk, and told her to leave. So, she packed-up all her stuff and left, despite me pleading with her in the driveway not to.

I've since committed to making real change, have continued seeing the therapist, joined AA, & am really working on changing myself.

Our communications has been few & far between. I did ask her to not rush off & file for a divorce/separation & give me time to work on myself, to which she agreed. I also tried to get her to attend an intensive marriage workshop, but she declined, essentially saying her heart was not in it at the moment. Since then I have essentially gone dark.

My question is regarding holiday gifts. I know some things she would like, and some friends think it would be an extremely kind gesture, but in DB, it says when using the 'last resort', not to observe any special occasions/send gifts/etc.

I'm not sure what to do. On one hand, I don't want to pressure/smother her, but on the other, perhaps it would be construed as inconsiderate & uncaring if I did nothing.

Any thoughts/guidance would be appreciated!

Thanks.