He'll keep escalating it until what? If I stay strong the whole time and don't respond or play his game, then what will happen? He'll explode with anger? I have read other sitches where they get nastier and nastier, but haven't read if it ends and what the end is.
He will get nastier and nastier. He may explode. He may give up. He may just keep it going. But by not playing HIS game, you can't lose.
If he explodes, he loses. You have the control. If he keeps getting nastier and you keep ignoring it, he loses. You have the control. If he gives up then you get peace and quiet. Bingo.
From what I've read, and I have no experience of this, his texts may waver between nasty and nice. You could respond to the nicer ones (ie. rewarding him) and ignore the nasty ones (chastising him). Only you can make that call.
If he sends a nasty text with a question in it (maybe abvout the kids or the mortgage - something you need to answer) then leave it for a minimum of half a day (or longer - respond in a time much longer than you would normally, even a day or so later) and reply ONLY to the question and ignore everything else.
Just be business like.
Quote:
He's so dead set on a D. I don't think he'll give up.
Then why hasn't he filed yet? If he is so dead set, then you either keep DB'ing in the hope it works or you do what you have to to protect yourself - that may mean NC / LRT, lawyer, whatever. Do what you need to do. Once you've protected yourself, let HIM do the legwork. If he wants a D make him WORK for it.
My guess, and it's only a guess, is he is using the D to punish you.
Last edited by P17; 12/13/0902:03 AM.
Me 36, W 34 | D 8 | M 3.5y Sep 2Aug09 | Left 6Sep09 | OM in 10Oct09 | NC 17Nov09 | Gave up caring - Jan 2010
"Have integrity. Do what is right, not what is expedient." "Delay is the antidote for anger"
