I waited until after our 2nd counseling session to reply to this...I wanted to make sure that I was not actually assuming. The counselor validated that my H is putting others in front of US; he proceeded to do the same in our 2nd session. She pointed the instances out to him in our session - not once but several times. He is incapable of focusing on our relationship at this point in time; we can't even discuss, in counseling, our relationship without him bringing other people into it. Everything my H said was concerned with the feelings of others (his dad, his brother, his mom, his 8 year old nephew and that's just the first 2 sessions AND not all of his family) with no regard for the bond we're supposed to have as husband and wife.
I think the counselor telling him that he does this, aside from me pointing it out for years, was a huge wake-up call for him. He did apologize to me. However, he still insists that he really is not doing this AND is only saying things that make it appear that way. Sigh.
