Deployed Soldier/Father needs your help

[SoldierDad]

Ok, just got this from BIL:

B, I'm scared he comes home tomorrow and Im scared of what he could
do. I can't even think of being with someone else not now not in my
future I don't want another man in my life right now except for my boys.
This crap has been going on for a long while and I just can't and will
not live like this. I don't know what he's been telling you but I its
nice he can air out our dirty laundry to my family that pisses me off
more then anything Im sorry you and other B have to endure his gripping
the boys don't answer their cells anymore they said all he talks about
is where am I what am I doing and they are tired of all the complaining
he does.... thank you for your support wish you guys were closer to me

She is spinning right now-putting out feelers to see what I know, and if I have said anything to the Brothers.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

DO NOT REPLY.

You've spoken your peace to BIL for now -- let it lie.

When's your flight?

[SoldierDad]

About 40 minutes Puppy. Bus was delayed-my luck, shoulda been gone to the airport an hour ago.

I am going to try to sleep on the plane, and make notes on the plan of action.

[Coach]

Save it for your attorney. You are in listen only mode.


What else are you looking forward to when you get home?

[luvless]

Affairus interruptus, my brutha man -- makes for a peaceful flight, no??

LMAO!! I love it

[TrentC]

You want a "small" victory SD?

Here's your victory: For many, many months, your wife has been planning on how this is all going to go down. In ONE WEEK, you have spoiled those plans, and have gone on the offensive.

Exactly! The TRO and implications of feeling "threatened" are her running scared.

When Private Douchebag is out of the picture, she'll really be in a tizzy. When her request for a TRO is dismissed because there's no basis for it, she'll be reeling.

And you need to be there. Strong, full of compassion for what she's had to deal with at home while you were serving your country, but not going to take any crap.

You love her and you want to work things out with her. But she needs to stop being this scared, miserable wretch and start being the woman that you married again for that to happen.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

She is spinning right now-putting out feelers to see what I know, and if I have said anything to the Brothers.

fwiw, that isn't how I read that. I think she's trying to create contemporaneous witnesses, after-the-fact. Which, ya know, is pretty much the OPPOSITE of what "contemporaneous" means, ya know what I mean?

She's trying now, that she's fogged out and in lust with another man, to re-write her marital history TO OTHER PEOPLE (like BIL), so that they will believe her crap when she tries to say she's felt unsafe for YEARS.

It's transparent as hell, and it's NOT going to work. Especially with people with whom she hasn't kept a good, HONEST relationship.

Puppy

[BobbiJo]

^^^Agreed

[Greek]

fwiw, that isn't how I read that. I think she's trying to create contemporaneous witnesses, after-the-fact. Which, ya know, is pretty much the OPPOSITE of what "contemporaneous" means, ya know what I mean?

She's trying now, that she's fogged out and in lust with another man, to re-write her marital history TO OTHER PEOPLE (like BIL), so that they will believe her crap when she tries to say she's felt unsafe for YEARS.

It's transparent as hell, and it's NOT going to work. Especially with people with whom she hasn't kept a good, HONEST relationship.

Puppy

That is EXACTLY what I was thinking. Exactly!
Greek

[SoldierDad]

Puppy, ya I see it now. I have so much to learn.
Well, gotta get dressed, and finish up packing. I will be on here for a little while longer. Thank you all for everything. The amount of love and compassion, as well as "tough love" on these boards is overwhelming. I love you all. I will link up again soon, to continue down this road.

America-I'm comin' home!!!