According to my IC/MC and everything I have read, the top reasons for divorce are the three A's; Adultery, Abuse, and Addiction. I believe that our sitches are quite similar with one exception. You are still living under the same roof as WAS. I am not. H and I have no addiction issues, nor has there been any type of abuse in our M. I have not been able come up with any proof regarding an affair at least while he was still living in the house. Now, I just don’t know. I hope not, but….if there is no abuse or addiction in the R/M then it has to be an affair. Right? I mean, what else could it be? Surely someone wouldn’t just walk away without having one of these three things. And round and round I go until it makes me crazy.
Originally Posted By: givingitmyall
I just don't understand how a person gets to that point absent abuse, infidelety, or substance abuse. None of those are present in my M, nor have they been. My W, I believe, equates herself with a victim of those types of transgressions, but I do not know why or how she can do that?
Anyway, what I am trying to say is that I ask myself the same questions. And each time, I conclude that my WAS is doing what H feels is right. He can’t explain it and may not even understand it himself. And if that’s the case, the LBS cannot even begin to understand it either.
What’s the saying? Believe nothing they say and only ½ of what they do. I think this applies in your case and unfortunately the understanding piece of it all may never come.
