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1. SHUT UP. Do not respond.

Turn the mind game back onto her. Let her worry about what you are going to do... and then get slapped in the face when it gets done. This is what she is doing to you isn't it? Turn the tables.

2. Follow the advice you have been given.

I warned you that she is on the warpath. And I told you she is getting legal advice. Hence: Restraining Order. She is doing whatever her L tells her to do.

It's time for you to disconnect too. Do not open anymore emails from her because they get you worked up. If she calls your base you leave standing instructions for "Radio Silence" i.e. "Sorry, SD is out on manouvres. Dunno when he'll be back. Will take a message." So as far as she knows... you're still wherever you are.

This will send her in a tailspin.

You feed the enemy disinformation. If she doesn't know where you are and what you're doing she can only taunt you. Maintain radio silence.


M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married
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GIMA -

No one can prove he read the email, right?

NO OFFENSE SD, but she doesn't appear to be sharp enough to utilize anything high tech to track emails (AOL is only one that shows if it was opened, as far as low tech...., right?)

So, if he doesn't reply w/a rebuttal, it doesn't mean he's admitting anything... he might not have seen it!


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
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Avoid her she is poisonous to you right now. She will do whatever she feels like to hurt, confuse, threaten and worry you. Do not be alone with her. Do not respond. Expect more of the same from her. She wants to keep you off balance with the threats and lies. This is to cover up the real issue. She is so lost and you are the enemy.

No communication with her (comm-out procedures in place). CYA is your job right now. Your best offense now is a great defense, run deep - run silent. I know this is hard and surreal but you have been dealt it. How would handle being solo behind enemy lines? Use your training to help you. What's the first step? What's the plan to re-join your unit? This is a opportunity to show your character.


M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12
Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
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Originally Posted By: givingitmyall
Sorry, but maybe it's the L in me, but I disagree. I WOULD respond, but only to say (a) I did not threaten your life or threaten you in any way and have no idea what you are talking about and (b) I will be taking action to protect myself. Very business like and to the point. Nothing more.

GIMA, I respectfully disagree. There are 1000 reasons SD can give, unless she has PROOF that he received, read and understood the message.

Your response is what her lawyer is waiting for.

Disrupt the pattern.

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Originally Posted By: givingitmyall
Sorry, but maybe it's the L in me, but I disagree. I WOULD respond, but only to say (a) I did not threaten your life or threaten you in any way and have no idea what you are talking about and (b) I will be taking action to protect myself. Very business like and to the point. Nothing more.

My concern is that not responding might be argued to be an admission - You did not dispute it.


I stand corrected. Good advice. But after you tell her that, DO NOT CONTACT HER!

Last edited by soleil; 12/11/09 04:53 PM.

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Soldier,

You have received your orders.... almost EVERYONE who has "been there, done that, is still doing it etc" is telling you the SAME thing...

This is experience talking here. Dude, I understand the sh!tload of stress you are going through right now and your NEED TO REACT. We all do.

We agree that you need to react... all we saying is this:

NOW IS NOT THE TIME OR PLACE TO DO IT.


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Originally Posted By: Gnosis
1. SHUT UP. Do not respond.


This made me LOL.

Oh and Soldier, a few pages back I had told you that you ahd "set the wheels spinning in motion" in her mind by telling her you won't share her with anothe rman... as evidenced by her little note to you, it was true!!!

She is going out of her mind not knowing what you know. Be stealth...very stealth. After you not responding to her she is going to feel like a dumbass for all of those awful things she's saying. Maybe not today, or a month from now even, but she will eventually. Trust me!


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Originally Posted By: SoldierDad
I am going to tell her family about this. They really need to know that i am not crazy, and she is doing this stuff. seriously, will this help?


What part of "do not overreact" are you misunderstanding? If she wants to portray you as crazy and out-of-control, you're giving her plenty of ammunition.

Just stop casting about for something to do. Talk to your lawyer and wait to hear from COC regarding the issue with this other soldier.

Her family will find out in due time, when you start dropping the evidence from the PI on her.


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

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Ya, I am listening to you all.

Should I reply to the e-mail about the threats?
I am hurting so bad right now. She is so nasty and vile. She basically admitted the A, but again-NO CONSEQUENCES for her!!!! She does what she wants. I want to see some results from this, it just seems to be making things so much worse...

Trent you are right. It will wait.

Last edited by SoldierDad; 12/11/09 05:02 PM.

"embrace the suck" - Coach
"don't go all "Melty Man" on us" - Puppy
Let Go and Let God
Finally "Got It" - 15 Jan 2010

SoldierDad

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SD -

She will have plenty of consequences to wallow in.

No one knows right now. Wait until it's out in the open.

She cannot keep you from your sons. I am sure an attorney can do some kind of emergency hearing on Monday if she tries to withhold them. Remember, you are a soldier.

Stay calm.


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
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