It’s scary how dreams can speak so much truth, huh, to have that dream and then find out this. So how did you find out OW was living there - did H actually tell you? It's good that you put that out there about the truth b/c if he wants to come home like he said he does, the truth is key! I'm so sorry that's the way it is, but he still has the option to chose you and move past OW and the lies. I know I keep thinking too about how if H does ever come home, there is soooooo much to overcome still. But that is just too overwhelming, so we just need to take it one step at a time...back to those baby steps idea (I hate those b/c I want it all resolved yesterday, but that's how change progresses, in baby steps). A big step for him would be to come clean, so maybe it would be good if the opportunity presents himself to let him know that you will not "beat him down" (and then you in turn would have to not react immeditately if he does tell you or else you prove his point exactly). Just keep your cool and let him know nicely that you need some time to think about what he told you, and then you are in control on how you want to progress with that information. The things he is doing are all deeply rooted so he's not just going to change overnight. Just continue to monitor his results and as he continues to draw to you and S, he should draw away from her. So keep an eye out for the baby steps. But on the other hand, just continue to work on boundardies as you see applicable b/c you don't want him take advantage of you either. Like you said, he needs to stop playing iwth your emotions about coming home, when he's still living with OW. Blah. It's just so hard to know what lines to draw and when. It's like a game and it's all about timing.
Christmas is a difficult one that's sure. Everyone wants to see S and I sure don't want to give up any of my time with S either. It makes it that much more difficult when you don't get along well with your inlaws either. But like you said, your anniversary should be pretty telling of where H is at, so hopefully that will give you some direction as well. And if H does want you to come to Christmas, he better be willing to stand up to his mom for you. Her actions in this have been horrible as well.
Well, I hope today goes better for you. I am impressed with your strength in all this. I know it must have been hard to take. Keep us updated.
Me 27; H 28; S 2 Togeth 9; M 4 Sep 11/14/08 EA OW1 Sep 08 EA OW2 Mar 09 EA OW3 Jun 10
