F, thanks for answering about the house. I agree with BeingMe and wanted to say the same thing. Still working from the same post here.
Originally Posted By: futureunknown
Since most of the stuff in the basement is yours, I don't think it's fair for me to slave down there for hours dealing with all the waterlogged stuff. I think you should help clear it out.
If those are the exact same words you used then you went about it the wrong way. It sounds like you're trying to emotionally blackmail her. i.e. "Poor me, you left your crap lying around and now I have to clean it up. It's not fair! You should do it..."
Then when you pushed with the "What do you mean not now?"... it triggered her own emotional blackmail response... I can't go in that house again. I can't handle it. i.e. Poor me... and then SLAP!!! ... You said we're separated and we're done, then we're separated, and we're done. I dunno how many times I've to said this on the board: Anything you say or do can and will be used against you... Guaranteed! That my friend is what is called MANIPULATION and your W is extremely GOOD at it. That's what MC's do don't they? Use your own words against you to dig deeper into the meaning behind them. To get you to doubt your own motives and discover your intentions.
If you want to hire someone to go in and clear it out, I'll contribute to that. Have a couple of pro's come in. Get them to salvage whatever they can. When they're done, get her stuff sent to her with a note: "Thought you might still want some of this." What you send should not be anything to create guilt or put pressure on her. Make it a friendly gesture. It'll get her thunking...
