It might not be lying, but IMO it's manipulative and just as bad.
I agee with not doing things in in order to be manipulative. But that doesn't mean you can't add some mystery to your life. I don't think it is being manipulative to not be where you are "supposed" to be all the time. I don't think it's being manipulative to do things for you.
It is manipulative to lie. If a guy was to take himself to dinner, and smear some lipstick on his collar before he got home, that would be manipulative. If the same guy took himself to dinner, and decided to stay at the sports bar to watch the rest of the game, and hence be out a little longer than someone might be anticipating, I don't think that would be manipulative.
In my opinion the key is to do for yourself. If your spouse chooses to have a reaction, that's up to them, but it should not be your whole purpose in what you are doing.
