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Originally Posted By: luvless
I hear you Trent - I know it's not healthy what I'm doing to myself but it's a process I have to go through to get myself back up ya know?


I understand; I just don't see how being passive about it will help, especially if the goal is to rescue the marriage.

If he could see and hear you now, would he be moved to try to work things out?


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Luv - Hiya. I feel ya' honey.

Can you confide in the friend you're having lunch with? It might help to talk to someone in person...

I know it's hard, especially since I've tried to explain my situation to a friend or two before, and I just can't find the words.

HUGS my friend!


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
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(((mind)))

thank you sweety - yes I have confided in her and will talk to her about it a little but won't make our whole visit just that. I miss her and need to catch up and that's what we'll do.

I'm going to keep listening hard to the boys - I get an oscar for swallowing my tongue lately!

i love you guys - thanks for your much needed support


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
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Luv, I choke on mine constantly!


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,372
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Hey Luv,

What makes you think he's having an A?


Me: 29
Got a ticket to the D concert
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Sol... was just going to ask the same thing!


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,583
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luvless Offline OP
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He's acted like this before and he was "talking" with another coworker. I never found out if it was physical I busted it up before I got to that point I truly believe.

He is very mean and distant to me - classic sign

Hey..the heartache diet is doing me some good I lost 5 lbs these last 2 weeks. ugh


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,975
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Luv, Ick.

How does he treat the kids? How are they treating him?

I think I got two of your five.

Blech.

How was lunch????


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,583
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luvless Offline OP
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Hi Mind sweet girl,

He is very impatient with the kids but he does try and talk to them. They are a little irritated with his behavior.

Two of my five?

Lunch was amazing. I missed my friend and we caught up. We talked alot about my R but she wanted to talk about it.

I got some stuff to say but I'll be back.


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 582
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Hey Luvless, yes we are in the same position. My H's suspected A though is believed by others to have been a few months ago. But I hate this feeling of not knowing.

In one way I don't want to know, but then of course you do. What a predicament to be in. I just wanted you to know I feel what you''re going through, and I will also be checking in on your sitch to see how it goes. Good Luck


M: 31
H: 29
Married: 6 yrs
Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old





Separated: Sept. '09
Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09
Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10
Threatening to leave again: July,14
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