Ring On or Ring Off????

[ddstartingover]

Last Wednesday I got a call from the school nurse (since I work at supt. office now, it's a direct line). She said D16 was having stomach pain and she was worried about appendix. I called clinic and couldn't get her in. Nurse said --- she's getting worse you need to take her to E.R. I went and got her and headed to E.R. I called H and told him what was up. He asked what he should do----I said it was up to him. He asked should he pick up D12 and S10----I said they could ride the bus. He couldn't decide what to do, so I told him I would just call the school and send them home on the bus.

Got to E.R.around 10:30. They did blood and urine tests and then said it could be ovarian cyst or appendix, needed CT. I kept H (and everyone else) posted via text every step of the way. They did CT and came in to say that right ovary was 2X normal size and they thought falopian tube was twisted----needed sonogram to be sure. Told me that if it was twisted, she would need surgery. I called H----told him, he said he had decided to go to OUR home and stay with D12 and S10---who went home on bus. THis after he sent me text asking if he should pick them up from school----after they already had gone home on bus. Said he would head to hospital if she was going to have surgery. After sonogram, report was that surgery was needed STAT----within 30 minutes to save her ovary. The ovary had twisted around her tube 3 times. I sent text that surgery would be in 30 minutes----no time to call (because things were happening really fast). He was pissed----thought if there was going to be surgery, he would get to see her first. I called him and let him talk to her for a minute.

They took us to surgery and I signed all the forms and hugged and kissed her and watched her go in---all by myself. It was now 5:30. I had been there 7 hours, no break. NO help. Nothing to eat all day. I didn't have a choice. Didn't even think about it. I knew it was wrong that H didn't come to hospital sooner. I have no idea why he thought he would have time to get here if the answer was surgery (hospital is 45 mintues away from home). It was his choice to wait----I'm sure to avoid emotional time with me. BUT, I handled it all without too much emotion. I was calm the whole time----these days anytime anything happens that would have normally been stressful, I handle it fine. Nothing ever seems as bad as what I've been through over the past 2 years. I was scared and nervous---my baby was having emergency surgery and I was alone withough support. H showed up during the surgery with D12. I almost broke down, but didn't. It was sad really. Going through this huge thing with OUR daughter and being so separate.

Surgeon came out and said all was well. After they untwisted tube ovary looked normal----she got to keep all of her parts! They did surgery laparoscopically---so just an incision in her belly button and another near pubic bone. They discharged her almost immediately----which was more scary than anything else. They put her in wheelchair within an hour of surgery and pointed us to the elevator. H offered to get her meds while I took her home. I accepted. He brought them out and stood there. Then he sat on floor next to her----his first time to "sit" in our home in forever. It was forced. It was awkward, but he was there briefly----and then it was all on me. I woke her every 3 hours during the night for pain meds for 3 days. He stayed with her during the day on post-op day 2 (at our home) so I could work. He almost acted normal when I came home.

She seems to be almost fully recovered (incisions still healing). I'm so thankful I took her to E.R.----I had no idea. AND they have no idea why it twisted.

When I think about how awful it all was and how awful it was that we weren't all together and coping with this together, it gets me down-----but then I know I handled it ok on my own---and I know I can handle anything from now on----it just SUCKS!

We had 4 inches of snow Monday night----snowday at school. H texted me yesterday and offered to come take me to work (I HATE to drive in snow---and he knows it). First time he's offered to do ANYTHING for me in I don't know how long. I accepted. He came out with S10 and swept off porch and shoveled paths to cars. It almost seemed normal. He almost seemed normal. I was gracious and thanked him. Fixed him coffee. We had another 3 inches last night---another snowday. He offered to come get me again, but so far I'm sitting at home. I don't want to read anything in to his offer----and hate to accept his help, but part of me wonders if it's a good thing to let him do this----since he's offered. I wonder "could he be peeking," but then immediately don't want my mind to go there.....................