Did she refuse outright as in “No, I won’t stop” or did you know she was refusing because you continued to gather intel?
What was your evidence in total? I remember reading how you got to her cell and saw the text messages.
She refused to stop -- "He's just a friend, so I shouldn't have to give that up. I should be allowed to have friends." I told her that she was then putting a FRIENDSHIP -- "if that's all it is, and we both know you're lying about that right now" -- ahead of her HUSBAND, and that was a boundary that I could not abide.
My intel consisted of:
- GPS cellphone hidden in the trunk of her car, which revealed she'd been hooking up with OM when she said she was either at work or running an errand;
- voice-activated recorder hidden under the front seat of her car, which revealed many cellphone conversations between her and OM (including sex talk, planning on their next hook-up, planning their lies, talking about me, etc.);
- keylogger on the home computer, which revealed the things I mention in my story above, plus apartment searches, "how to help kids deal with divorce," etc. Nothing on "how to work on a marriage."
