Yesh, he's already off-guard. He thinks he is so smart and he's got you completely fooled. Why should he think otherwise? the points you made earlier are perfect.
I guess I figured if I could keep up the pretense of it being a "date night" that I might catch him off guard.
I'm sorry, MG, I don't understand what you mean by that??
Puppy
I think it's along the same lines as "joking" about his GF calling him; she hopes to trick him into giving something away.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Trent - you are right. Looking at what you wrote, it seems childish.
If it was not for my kids, I probably would have crawled under the covers and stayed in bed today feeling sorry for myself.
I am trying to maintain an outward appearance of having it together. Spent a little extra time with hair/makeup/clothes today. But the sick feeling in my gut still has not gone away. I hate confrontations and not looking forward to talking to H. No plans to bring it up tonight, I have got to be more focused and in control first.
H asked me what I had planned for Sat as he wants to watch UFC. Nice priority if we were actually going on what was said in last R talk about making time for each other. I see how I can't believe ANYTHING he says.
And I think he is oblivious to what I know. He seemed to be in a good mood tonight and carried on with his afterwork routine like always.
Okay... so how is this for boundaries...
"Considering all of the recent deceit on your part, I really don't think a 'date' on Saturday is appropriate at this time. I have decided that I will no longer be disrespected that way. I will not live in an open marriage and share my husband with another woman. I wasn't a perfect wife but I will not tolerate the affair in our family home. It is disrepectful to me, our marriage and our family.
You need to terminate all communication with OW IMMEDIATELY and if you don't, I think it is best that YOU move out. I will not live in a marriage like this. I want you to find another place and be out of here by as soon as possible."
Do I get deducted any grades for plagiarism?
Any advice? Would it be better to do it face to face or by email?
When I confronted my husband I put on my sexiest nightgown, then I walked into the bedroom where he was watching tv and told him I knew the truth about him and his GF and he could stop lying to me. I went on and he sat there pretty quietly, still lying and clinging to his story. But I was proud of myself for standing up to him and saying what I had to say.
For us, it didn't get better right away. I shared my truth with lots of people. Not saying it's the thing to do. Just saying that's what I did. My kids were old enough to speak their minds to their Dad, and of course, they were on my side. Things got much worse between us. Until they got so bad that we knew we had to do something or we would make the front page of the newspaper (not in a good way). That's when we agreed to go to Retrouvaille. And for us, that was the road back together.
Your experience won't be the same as anyone else's. There's no way to know how it will end up. You need to be happy with yourself however things go. If you don't confront and say something, his behavior will not change. Deep down most of these cheaters know they are doing wrong. Some will never admit it. Some will change because they don't like what they have become. But doing nothing will not change anything. If you want to see change, you will have to make change.
oh... and puppy.... you called OW the first day I posted. Don't you hate being right sometimes.
And many thanks for the eye opener as I would still be unhappy and oblivious. The truth hurts but at least now I can make my decisions knowing what cards he has up his sleeve.
oh... and puppy.... you called OW the first day I posted. Don't you hate being right sometimes.
I think I speak for PDT when I say that none of us want to be right about wayward spouses having an affair.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
