Counseling conundrums

[Gardener]

H told me that the first thing that friends and family on his side of the fence ask is "why now? before the holidays?"" Because that was the right decision for me." And it's not like I can give them part of the honest answer- I felt emotionally beat up. Why not? It's the truth. And I guess his friends must not have been too surprised overall if their concern was the timing, not the fact that I actually left. Of course not. They know the kind of man he is. They've heard him talk about you and can surmise the kind of H he is. I'll bet that they knew H wasn't happy, but not any of the background story- so I look like the irrational WAW. Nah. You're mind reading.

H is still peeved that I talked to S19 about seeing the MC. Too damned bad. He feels that was totally a major-league bone-head move on my part. Doesn't he feel that way about most of your "moves", decisions, actions? Screw him.I respectfully disagree, and I think we should have had discussion with D17 also. So, do so. On your own. You're allowed.

He also stands by his statements that I distorted reality at the MC sessions by presenting myself so well- according to H, that was not the person he lived with everyday. He does however regret lashing out as he did when he first told me about these feelings. Gee, thanks...Pure crap

He's still being nice at the moment. He's offered to help set up a couple things around the townhouse. I'd suggest, "Thanks, but no thanks. I got it covered.

It's too quiet around here. D17 has yet to stay the night, but she has come over for dinner a couple times. She's still having a hard time with this. She will for quite some time to come. Listen to her. Validate. Commiserate. Don't explain. S19 is done with his college semester this week, and he plans to spend a lot of time at the townhouse over winter break. So he's the opposite- I need to remind him to spend time with his Dad.

It's way too quiet, and I'm really tired but I have a hard time making myself go to bed at night, and I haven't figured why yet. Maybe I'm just not feeling settled in yet. Um, yeah. Much disruption. There's still daily contact with H for one thing or another, I need to get away from that. Go dark. Or dim at the very least. And it's not just me- he initiates just as much as I do. And I know I need GAL activities before I sink into a hole. Then, get started girl! Pick one and do it.

I'm rambling again. I'm tired, and I better turn the light out- good night all.

And good night to you, from The Rambler-In-Chief!