Hey, if you've read LL's thread you'll know that you're allowed to vent. I know what you wrote above is not a pity party and you're releasing your frustration. Yeah, I can tell the difference.
I'm not here to judge you and am glad you're reading a novel and taking your mind off the sitch for a while. Yes, you do need a break. I'm wish I had the time to read through your entire thread and give you some pointers. I suppose the best advice I can give you right now is: Try to distance yourself from him and his behavior as best you can. Try not to take this personally. Sure you made some mistakes... we all have.
Keep strong and take some time out for yourself. You deserve it.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT