I too understand exactly how you feel about wanting to give up on standing. It is so hard to keep going sometimes when things seem impossible or something else comes up to smack you in the face. I have had days where I felt like I was "done" only to realize I personally can't be . . . yet. We do all deserve to have our spouses in love with us and wanting to be with us. Hang in there!
Thanks guys...Im really really trying to just be patient a little longer. I think its just because NOTHING is happening lately. BUT Im trying to give him all the space in the world to work through this mess...but will he ever??
I mean, I want some attention!!!!!!!!
Saturday night he went to his annual christmas party with the ems people...I have always hated going to that party every year...well at least up till 3 years ago...but I guess a part of me had hoped he would have wanted me to go this year...Not that I would have, but the thought would have been nice...Im sure he didnt ask because he knew I wouldnt go...but still...its the thought...then he said yesterday that he werent that talkative, so he was quiet most of the day...hardly heard from him at all.
I guess it's things like that that are bothering me. Then I ran into a neighbor and found out that some woman my H was friends with had left her H and I knew he had been talking to her some...of course this was MONTHS ago and has no bearing on us now, but still it sends me spinning just a little bit to having to deal with the past.
Day is getting better. Im stronger than I use to be thats for sure, but I still have my days of doubt.
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
You know Jack...I said that to myself...he certainly cant read my mind....thats probably a good thing though
Thanks cagz...Im doing all I know how to do...working on my christmas list now! Almost done!!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
OK...so why would me H text me and ask if I was ok today? I said I was fine and then asked how was he...he replyed he was "OK I guess". So I asked what was wrong and he replys "not much". OK...whats that mean?
I know, stop it! So irritating sometimes....
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
My xh still does that to me sometimes. It usually happens when he's having a really bad day. Of course, he has a gf so I don't know why he comes running to me. I guess that even though I told him I'm not his 'safe place' anymore he can't get past that.
You're doing good kissak.
Your Christmas list? You mean the list of stuff you need to get and get done or what you're asking Santa for?
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
You mean there are no mind readers on this site anymore????? Thats just great! Oh well.....
Oh, and my list is the one telling me who I have left to buy a gift for! Im almost done with the shopping!!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
It is so hard to re-learn how to talk to people you know or have grown accostumed to.
Text:
"It seems like something is bothering you, but unless you tell me I don't have a clue and make an assumption, which based upon past performance doesn't do well for either one of us. My current assumption is: Holiday Blues. In which case if I am correct, then yes. I understand. If however the something that is bothering you is the current state of world affairs and the Coppenhagen Summit, I would have no idea about that."
Or something similar without the smartass parts.
Last edited by Jack_Three_Beans; 12/07/0909:40 PM.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK