WAW on suicide watch, what now???

[MHL]

Today is a little harder for me, having seen my W yesterday for about an hour and the interaction was good. A lot of the feelings for her did come rushing back later on for part of the day yesterday and pretty much full on this morning. This is the hard part, there is contact again but I need to stay positive with her and continue to GAL.

She did say some things yesterday that surprised me. She said that the new drugs she is on are much better and are doing a good job. She did seem more normal, more like her old self again, but I have to remember to believe nothing she says and half of what I see. The other thing she said is that she had dinner with her late father's second ex-wife. My W says that her father's 2nd X ruined his life and caused a great deal of pain. My W has always hated her. She shared with me that she forgave her and since her father was dead there was no reason to harbor those feelings. Knowing the sitch I said "really, i can't believe it, that is good". I wanted say " where does the line start for you to start forgiving people for the past" HA HA.

Again I don't want to read anything into this and definitely don't want to get hopes up but if while in the hospital she talked about forgiving people and putting the past behind them.....??? Another thing that has come up in the last 24 hours is that S9 told me during bedtime prayers (he prays for family healing every night) that Mom said that her and I are like gas and fire and when we are together that we blow up. Son told my W that Dad is acting alot better now. (I do own my anger management issue from the past) My W told S9 that she knew that but she needs to see more of it before she comes home. Is she open to the possibility of reconciliation? I'll never mention it have to be patient and let her come to that decision in her time.

I think that I need to continue with the LRT and continue the 180's. However, I don't want to be a doormat. Making her come all the way out to the house last night was no big deal for her but it helped me. She was a little peturbed and her mood was definitely different from earlier in the day. I am just playing it cool on the whole lawyer thing for now and see what happens and try to make any contact with her pleasant and non-confrontational, just like the list Sandi had floating around on a couple of threads.