"Apparently I was missed - I have been included in the sibs' secret Santa (they set it up that households are buying a gift for another household, rather than individuals this year - I got younger BIL's house, the one who recently had the baby I haven't met). He is the one who is hosting XMas this year, and I was invited again. I guess I will wait to decide until it gets closer, again. I think I am still re-setting the relationships in my head."
Ughhh. I'd hate that if it happened to me. Tough sitch for you, no wonder you feel heavy. This really is kind of a big deal and it will take a lot of work to figure out what to do, no matter what you decide. Priority: YOU, taking care of YOU.
