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He's gonna lie, Britt, and for me, the lying would be waaaay worse than the cheating.

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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
He would deny it even IF there was concrete proof.


So true.

(((Brit)))

I am sorry that this has to happen to you. Listen to the people offering advice. We are going to be with you every step of the way.

You are going to get through this.

Mo3


Me & H: 33 yrs
S: 4 & 6
D: 2
M: 9 yrs
ILYBNILWY: 8/09
SEPARATED: 9/09
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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
He would deny it even IF there was concrete proof.


Yep. ALL CHEATERS LIE. Period.

Do not ask him. DO confront him, and tell him if he wants to come back and live with you, that he must be fully transparent with you.

Puppy

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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
He's gonna lie, Britt, and for me, the lying would be waaaay worse than the cheating.



It was for me, too. The deceit is the worst!

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Britt, please don't take this the wrong way because I mean it with all the care in the world, but:

SHUT UP, WAIT AND THINK!!!

Nothing's changed in your situation. The only thing that has changed is your own perception of reality. So I'm telling you again: STICK TO YOUR PLAN (the one Gucci outlined for you)

Calm down, ignore his existence. Take your kids and get out of the house. Go and do something. Don't be there when he wakes up. Return after you know he's left.


M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married
4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
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Gno is right. No matter how much you may have thought you have geared yourself in preparation, you are in pain and shock. Not a good base to have any discussion.

Just collect yourself, and let 1-2 days pass as you come to terms with your feelings. Get as much evidence as you can.

Much easier said than done of course. Sometimes I think back to my sitch and the milestones and all the things I did wrong (and there are many). Not reacting upon discovery is probably one thing I'm pretty sure I'd still fail to do properly even with hindsight.


Me 42
W 39
Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992
First Bomb: Sep 2007
Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007
Kids: D10, S5
Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak.
3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.
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Originally Posted By: Gnosis


Nothing's changed in your situation. The only thing that has changed is your own perception of reality. So I'm telling you again: STICK TO YOUR PLAN (the one Gucci outlined for you)es up. Return after you know he's left.



This is a GREAT point!!!

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I try Puppy... now I hope she listens.


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Gno from Pluto calling Britt... are you out there? Over.

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She's probably looking for her golf clubs. laugh

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