#67 Cant find my "pieces"

[addie]

addie,
close friend are telling me "get ovet this, stoo asking about the A, her, forget it etc". And I try.But it's not healthy, it eats me up inside. It's something I NEED. Remember, I know all sorts of details. I need his take on how things happened. And that is a not controlling, it is setting boundaries. I need these things to be able to move on.

I've set boundaries and it hasn't worked in my case. H is still secretive and it causes me to wonder why. If you remember I also know many details because I had hacked into all his email accounts - yes, he had several and still does with different passwords which I no longer have access to. These are also things I need in order to be able to move forward. Although H says he wants our M to improve, he doesn't realize all the hard work that needs to be done (although I've laid it out for him). He expects that things will improve with few changes.

K, I hope you're able to set boundaries and your H is able to follow through. I would advise maybe setting one boundary at a time so as to not overwhelm him but letting him know that there are other things to deal with as well, just not all at once. I've been doing that with H recently and it's working out a little better.