After I honestly looked at myself and talked to my counselor at great length, I also believe the emotional abuse was WAW's attempt to justify the unjustifiable EA/PA. I wanted to put it on here, worms and all, to get more opinions. Thanks.
Her Mom thinks she is doing the loving thing for my WAW by funding her new life. I am not going to bother attempting to talk to her Mom - it will be seen as manipulative.
It kills me inside, but I am physically and emotionally detaching from WAW as much as I can without appearing rude. I will drop our S4 and S7 at her apt. in the morning when I go run a 5K (GALing at its best!) in -20F wind chill here in MT.
At drop offs now, I say goodbye to my boys while they are in my car to avoid having to go in her apt. Also I can control leaving the drop off rather than have have to talk to her or a "goodbye" scene with the boys. Interestingly, she makes a point of coming in our home and looking around when she drops off our boys for me.
I don't know if WAW is aware that others at the school know of her EA/PA. Her "thought" processes revolve around one thing (the EA/PA) right now.
Her higher order thinking appears distorted to me. She actually told me last weekend with a straight face that she didn't think H1N1 shots were needed for our S4 and S7. I stuck to my guns that H1N1 kills kids.
From what I understand, the H1N1 symptoms appear flu-like then morph quickly to something deadly. Our S7 has Aspergers and is not good at telling us when something is physically wrong with himself. She said our S4 goes to a small daycare so won't be exposed. However, the S7 goes to a 1500 kid school and wrestles his little brother every night. It seemed obvious to me to get them both the free shots.
She finally agreed that I could take them to get the shots since I think it's a good idea. I must say I completely broke down when WAW couldn't see me walking to the car with our boys because I could see how much she has lost it.
I will not keep my hope and expectation that she will come around by Christmas. You hit it square on the head - WAW is in deep. Thanks for the reality.
