Update. Had my work holiday party. W had planned to attend, but she had some deliverables for her job that were due yesterday, and those went late (not her fault), so she could not make the party. She apologized a few times last night about not being able to get herself organized enough to make the party. I repeatedly told her it was ok and I understood - and that was the truth.
The party was fun, more fun than I expected. I hung out with many of my friends and their respective spouses/SO's. Spoke with my clients who came.
And, it didn't occur to me until driving home that despite the fact my W wasn't with me at the party, I never felt alone. In fact, it didn't really occur to me that I didn't have a "date" for the party while I was there.
So, on some level, I think I am continuing to make progress in being comfortable being alone - being alone, but not lonely. Admittedly, I am concerned (scared?) of becoming more comfortable being without W. But, on a purely selfish level, I realize it is a consequence of becoming more independent, which is healthy, and will make me a better person - one capable of being a great catch for someone (might be W, might not). And, even if there isn't another someone anytime soon, that works too.
