Its like a internal tug of war with me. Yes it would be nice to be a family again, but then again I have my doubts of it working or being let down again.
Anyways, I am writing this and just got an email from X. Funny I have been trying to figure a response to see Santa, but I am glad I waited to send it after reading what X sent. Kinda crazy but neat.
"Thanks for letting the kids come that Wed :-) I just wanted to tell you this morning D asked who she was staying with tonight. I said "me silly". She said "I wanna see Daddy" I said "I know babe, you will soon" She said " NO I want to see you YOU AND daddy at the same time, like McDonalds" I had to laugh. The simplicity of a kid.
So I don't know how you feel about all of us hanging out, or if you even want to hang out again. You haven't really talked to me so I don't know if you want to be my friend or what? lol... (Even reading that it sounds funny.) Would you want to eat sometime just me and you? You know why we're at it why don't you just move in with me instead of buying your own house? ;-) haha... Hope your day is good."
The Weds thing is the 23rd of Dec. Has a family function for xmas that she wants the kids for which it goes both ways.
Its like the C said to us a long time ago, you have to work on being a couple before you can work on being a family. I will pass on the Santa, but will eat with X and see how it goes. I think I have a good idea what to expect and how to handle it. Like not rehashing things that have happened, just good memories, and focus on the present and future. Dont know, this is all weird territory for me!
