Typical Day = 0 communication. Today = 2 e-mails, 1 TM & 1 Phone call. She wants to go out and talk tonight. I don't have much to say but I'll be a great listener.
What a difference a day makes.
M-49 W-48 M-18, T-24 S-12 -------------- 12/08-ILYBINILWY 3/09-EA & PA Discovered 4/09-Began DBing 1/10-2nd Bomb PA Fully Disclosed
The boundary is unwavering. It's a NUT (non-negiotable unalterable term). Hold onto your NUTs.
I would be reluctant to agree to anything. Validate her then tell her "I need some time think about my my decision."
Make sure she sticks to issues. Don't let her tell you what you think/feel/believe it's mind reading. Don't match her emotions. Look her in the eye and hold it. She's going to test you to see if you can stand up to her. Don't get baited into a argument. Show up looking and smelling great.
Quote:
What a difference a day makes.
Keep doing what works.
You can handle it.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
And NEVER divulge the source of your intel. If she asks you what you know, say "I know enough to know that I'm not willing to live in an open marriage," or "I know that you're having an affair," and leave it at that.
If she asks you HOW you know, say "I'm not saying. Suffice to say that I know."
I have excellent intel and records and certainly don't want to compromise them now.
I understand transparancy and may wait for MC to establish, no rush, it's already been a long journey.
It's common knowledge that: 1. She has been emotionally and sexually disconnected from me for over a year. 2. She wants me to seek sex outside the marriage. 3. She had a condom in her purse. 4. She admitted to PA in the past. 5. She is CERTAINLY not one to be celebate for long. 6. She absolutely belives that no human was meant to be in a monogomous relationship.
That's HOW WE know. And this is ALL THAT I need to know to express my boundary for my protection, my son's protection and MY marriage's protection.
M-49 W-48 M-18, T-24 S-12 -------------- 12/08-ILYBINILWY 3/09-EA & PA Discovered 4/09-Began DBing 1/10-2nd Bomb PA Fully Disclosed
