T- i hate to even think this - but from what you have mentioned about him - he seemed to have been a fairly sharp man with numbers in his career. so it leads to two thoughts 1.drugs/alcohol/prescription drugs or 2. his 10 year old girlfriend did the papers for him. (sorry had to throw her under the bus for you!!)
he was smart - something is wrong - (i am wondering seriously if he is medicated.. valum? hydrocodone? something "legal" but dangerous.)
you know that the judge will see just what you see. think about this.. seriously... they probably see stuff like this all the time.
sorry you are struggling.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
T My xh is the same--very confused and seem to be getting worse I thiok they get borderline mental illness my xh seems to be irrational and doesnt live in reality prescription drugs do that and in my xh case I beleive that is the reason plus I think the OW influences them if their thinking is also distorted after all that is their main reality check peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
I wish I new exactly what is going on with ex. I am starting to think he is on something, maybe cocaine. He has lost a lot of weight lately and he can't seem to keep his thoughts straight. It is hard to go dark when they are so pathetic.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
It is so hard to see them strugling. To see them like that hurts. As for the drugs, I feel the same way. The rapid weight loss is what caught my attention.
Her appetite decreased. Yet, she was still eating a lot of carbs. Made me wonder. Plus, I noticed her smoking increased as well.
I guess they will do anything to make themselves feel better. I can't imagine the pain they are in. That's why many people resort to drugs. Its just something to hide the pain they are in.
It is soooo painful to watch. Mine knows something is wrong with him, but he will not seek any help. Pride is a big factor in his case.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
T, This might not be what you want to hear but FWIW I think you should try and take your focus off XH and concentrate on you and the children.
I know it's hard and I know you don't feel you are done yet BUT if God willing your M is restored you are going to need to be the healthy one with a clear mind. Clouding it with what if thoughts about XH isn't going to achieve that. I know you let him be physically but try and do it mentally too. I think it will help you.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
You are probably right. That is what I need to do. Let him be.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Trusting, I have to agree that you need to keep the focus on you and your family. I understand the concern you are voicing. It could be any number of things going on, but the one thing that appears to be evident is that he is depressed and severe depression can create so much crazy behavior and yes, it does affect the memory.
Please try not to worry too much about what is going on. He could have been having a very bad day and their lack of concentration does take over when their brains are on overload.
Please plan to do something special for yourself this weekend. You deserve it!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Again, dont mean to hijack thread, but I just read the RIP VAN WINKLE Awakening in the MLC resources......that was back in 05....could you update me to what happened after that last post......I know you chose to go on w/o Rip...is he still alive??? no more contact at all??? just curious....all I can say to those posting was "wow"... thank you for still coming here to help.....
