I said, "I cannot sign off on that because you are asking me to accept 100% of the risk without recieving any percent of ownership. I will not be involved unless you accept me as a equal partner in this venture." This was very disruptive to her system and showed more backbone that she has seen in me in some time.

Ok, so I have not asserted a consequence of the A. To me, it is not all or nothing. I remain dedicated to my M and family and remain willing to pick up the pieces and work on our relationship when and if the time comes. Therefore, I cannot say with any integrity, "End it or I am out of here or you are out of here." Can anyone suggest other consequences that I can say with credibility?