Pls help--confused and fearful

[P17]

Thanks P17. Although it's tough to hear/read, you are right--just hard to accept to move on without him after 20 yrs of being together.

It's hard to accept that I have to move on after 3.5 years of M. I can't imagine how 20 must feel. Just remember, he does / will feel it too. You can't control how badly or when though, but he will. As sure as the sun comes up in the morning.

I'm afraid to get to that place that it would still hurt to see him even after I'd have moved on.

It won't always hurt, but you're right. Even after you've moved on you will likely get little moments or thoughts, glimpses etc. My worst fear is that W will be pregnant (I actually secretly believe she already is) and how that will make me feel. However there is no pint in worrying about it too much as I have no control over it.