Still in the tunnel with hubby

[sandycay]

Hi K

I read yesterday what had happened and couldn't find the right words to post. I have been at this longer than you and maybe that's why I am in a better place.

Your H sounded so much like mine did the past year.. cycling he even referred to it as that as well.

I can say that my kids C told me, as long as I am ok... the kids will be ok. It's hard but I have realized that my grieving is more over the idea of marriage, family and future and not over my H. I think I did that the 1st bomb and over the last year since things have been going downhill with spurts of good in between.

I am sorry that you are going thru this. My H says the same as yours but it doens't matter what they say because it makes no sense anymore and I am not riding the crazy train anymnore.

There is normalcy in my life that hasnt' been there in a long time and it feels so good to just be normal. I still miss having a husband, companion, but not my H. I hope that makes sense. I didn't have that with H either. It wasn't healthy anymnore and hasn't been for a long time.

I am now at peace that I have tried everything (even Db'd successfully the majority of the time) I read, got counseling, marriage counseling. It's not my choice of cards but I am going to deal with the hand I got dealt. For me.

Again, I am sorry.