Now more than ever!

[Coach]

The 800 lb gorilla in the room and you ignored it. No boundary about her affair??????????????????????

Boundries. She wanted to discuss a possible investment. I stated I am only willing to participate on certain conditions(and listed the conditions). The consequences of failing to honor the boundries would be that she would not achieve what she wants. Now, you may have a different take but I think this was pretty good. It goes right to the heart of cake eating. If you want this, then you must do this. You can't have it all your way and expect me to be involved. Well, she didn't like it one little bit. Much seething anger was thrown at me. I was being unreasonable, it would be too compicated, yadda, yadda yadda. I offered ways to simplify the problem without compromising my boundary or the consequences. I should have walked away, but didn't instead I stayed and took a lot of crap and tried to offer alternatives. She wanted none of it. The more I proposed creative alternatives, the more entrenched she got. I found this interesting.

You have no idea what a boundary is. Boundaries are about how you let other people treat you. Not what she gets! It's about behavior that is unacceptable to you. It's not conditional.

If you want this, then you must do this.

This is controlling.


There is a very specific, concise and clear way in which we shared with you how state a boundary. You can continue to try it your way or try what works. This isn't our first rodeo.

I should have walked away, but didn't instead I stayed and took a lot of crap and tried to offer alternatives. She wanted none of it. The more I proposed creative alternatives, the more entrenched she got. I found this interesting.

Yes, it's very interesting. It didn't work so you tried more of it. Noticing a trend here? Quit trying to be right and do the right thing.

Your listening skills need a lot of work.