I had an idea. I was able to fill out divorce papers online. I feel like I am ready to push this forward if she doesn't change, and I don't see any changes in her behavior or attitude about anything. It has been a year now.

She may be thinking about stuff on her own, but who knows and I am trying to avoid being a mind-reader.

So, I was thinking of telling her this:

"I have filled out a full set of D papers and am going to file them if you don't commit to:

a) stop all contact with OM
b) be totally transparent about your behavior and allow me to see all of your phone records going forward

"

I left out another condition, which is (c) commit to rebuilding our marriage, but at this point I am willing to delay filing for D if she just changes her attitude about her privacy and being 'friends' with OM.

I feel like I am serious about this and can follow through with filing for D if she refuses. I am just getting tired of the situation. If she is really done then we need to get on with it and this will shake out the answer anyway.

Any comments or feedback out there?

Last edited by tryingtilDorR; 12/02/09 09:01 PM.
ME/XW:47
S21, D19, S15, S14
M:21 T:26
W moved 6/10 I filed 7/10 D final 4/12 remarried 8/12
W wants to R 12/10 and 4/11 but I decline