I have done a pretty good job following most items on "Plan A". However, I see that I have not articulated the consequences of crossing the line of demarkation. I will work on this issue.
I also think I have done a good job detaching from the R. I have had to have about three different MCs tell me the same thing--back off, don't pressure, don't talk R. I have seen her come around somewhat, albeit inconsistently. She confided in me the other day she was feeling depressed. I, foolishly, a few days later followed up to check in on her. Her response was, "I don't know why I tell you that stuff, I am fine". Then I was met with much hostility the balance of the day. I think on some level she is testing me to see if I will lose my cool. It no longer works as well as it has in the past. Last night, she opened up about some concerns with work. I remained detached, but supportive. I discussed the problems she faced as her problems, not mine. (I am an exceptional problem solver, among the problem solvers of the world, I am one of the best. Except when it comes to R.)I also refused to discuss a financial situation with her. Today, she called to reinitiate the finanical conversation. A couple of times, I felt she was trying to goad me into opening the topic, but I didn't take the bait. I ended the conversation at a natural point for me. I think she is starting to notice a change in my additude toward her.
It is astounding that she can say ILYBNILWY, carry on an EA to some degree and at the same time look to me for endless support.
