Our financial agreement includes WAW doing what she has always done - buying groceries etc for the family. So on Sundays, she will be doing that and if things go ok, she will also be making dinner on Sundays as well.
I see no problem with any of that as long as I am not needy, clingy or persuing when she's around the house. There are some people here who would be thrilled to get to the point of there WAS having contact and keeping communication open. No point in making things worse by telling her I want nothing to do with her.
I will see how I feel regarding time with WAW over the next couple weeks and during our vacation and act accordingly.
She knows all of my co-workers, but it's highly unlikely she would come in contact with anyone. I am no where near the stage of dancing with someone else anyway - and don't want to do things just for the sake of dbing. Real changes for me - not just to get my WAW's attention.
She knows all of my co-workers, but it's highly unlikely she would come in contact with anyone. I am no where near the stage of dancing with someone else anyway - and don't want to do things just for the sake of dbing. Real changes for me - not just to get my WAW's attention.
I would think that becoming more outgoing WOULD be a real change for you, just based on what you've written.
She knows all of my co-workers, but it's highly unlikely she would come in contact with anyone. I am no where near the stage of dancing with someone else anyway - and don't want to do things just for the sake of dbing. Real changes for me - not just to get my WAW's attention.
I would think that becoming more outgoing WOULD be a real change for you, just based on what you've written.
Puppy
I am outgoing in some ways - I am a Sales Rep ya know. But I am not very social outside work hours. I am making an effort to do more things outside my comfort zone and not just spend all my time at home alone - although I really enjoy being at home. Admittedly, not so much right now, but that will come back with time.
My point was that I want to use this time without my WAW as a time to make changes in me - but only things that I really want to change. Making those real changes is also what my WAW is looking for from me. I am sure that my WAW wants us to reconcile at some point and decided that we need to be apart to do it.
Today, I have become aware that she is right. I'm not sure I should share that with her, but had we stayed together in the same house, those real changes would not have happened - at least on my part. I may feel differently later, but right now it feels like our separation is something I actually needed, but refused to accept.
Again, I should probably keep that information from my WAW.
Our financial agreement includes WAW doing what she has always done - buying groceries etc for the family. So on Sundays, she will be doing that and if things go ok, she will also be making dinner on Sundays as well.
I see no problem with any of that as long as I am not needy, clingy or persuing when she's around the house. There are some people here who would be thrilled to get to the point of there WAS having contact and keeping communication open. No point in making things worse by telling her I want nothing to do with her.
I will see how I feel regarding time with WAW over the next couple weeks and during our vacation and act accordingly.
If I didn't know better, I would say her behavior is possibly coming from feelings of guilt.
Our financial agreement includes WAW doing what she has always done - buying groceries etc for the family. So on Sundays, she will be doing that and if things go ok, she will also be making dinner on Sundays as well.
I see no problem with any of that as long as I am not needy, clingy or persuing when she's around the house. There are some people here who would be thrilled to get to the point of there WAS having contact and keeping communication open. No point in making things worse by telling her I want nothing to do with her.
I will see how I feel regarding time with WAW over the next couple weeks and during our vacation and act accordingly.
If I didn't know better, I would say her behavior is possibly coming from feelings of guilt.
I agree. She wants to feel like she hasn't totally abondoned her kids - and she wants them to feel like we are still a family of sorts. Making her feel any more guilty than she already does, is not something I want to do.
WAW call me early this morning to tell me her grandmother finally lost her battle with cancer. I wish I could be with her to comfort her. This is going to very tough on my D18. My S16 will be less affected. My kids have never dealt with the death of someone that close to them, and having it happen the same week their parents separate is really tough.
I spoke with WAW briefly, talked to my kids about the death and then came in to work. I want to "be there" for my WAW, but I think it's best to let her decide how much she wants from me. I don't want to make her uncomfortable.
This has been a tough week so far, but I am surprised at how well I am handling the separation. The anticipation was worse than the reality so far. Not sure, if it's me or the Prozac kicking in.
Be the rock for your family. If your really worried on how to act around your wife. Tell her that you are there for her in her time of need. Leave it at that and take care of your kids.
