I Am Done

[Yoyowife]

Awwwwww...Suzy Q you didn't have to start your own thread, I didn't mind having you for a "threadmate". LOL

You sound determined. You have given that man every possible chance there is to reform his ways. You have employed DBing techniques and tough love. He continues to show you that he is not willing to meet you half way. All you can do is take care of you and that precious little girl of yours. I think your ideas for support groups are wonderful ideas.

I'm with Saffie, see your lawyer ASAP. I'm not an advocate for divorce, but I am an advocate for living your life. Divorce may be the only option you have for living that life.

Hugs, Yoyo

[cat03]

try not to have your little one see you upset, it can be hard to hide it from her but she will be fine as long as she sees her mommy fine. Find a good friend to talk to when you feel bad.
My little girl didnt' mind much when we D'd, at this age they are very attached to us so it may not be as hard as if you had an older child.
It does make me mad that he just wants to be a lazy arse dad and give you such a lame excuse as for why he would cut contact with her... as much as a looser as he is she will always have a place in her heart for him... I hope he grows a spine at least for his daughter and tries to be a father to her.

I think you put up with enough, and I agree with you 100%, you dont' need that grief, that negative cloud above you, you will do much much better.

[Augtan]

SonFunOne--Wow, my XH's OW left her H and son to be with my H too. What is wrong with these people?

NoCodeBlues--our time frame for things that have happened are so close!

I have been on the MLC board and I am ready to move over here and move on!! I will not hijack Sue's thread, but just wanted to post here real quick, and say I think I have found where I need to be. XH is just soooo messed up and it has just gone on too long. We live 700 miles apart, he is with OW and they are still having to "hide" so it is thriving and exciting still due to this. They are hiding due to custody battle with her XH, after three years she decided she wants more visitation than 2 nights a month???!! Well, not happy at all to be here, but glad I think I found the right place for me!

M-39
WAH,in MLC-42
M-17 1/2 T-20
D16, S14, D10
MLC- 10/06 & started PA/EA
Bomb-7/6/07
sep. 9/07
back-12/07
sep. for good-7/08
D-5/09
find out he was with OW since 2/08--9/09

[SueS]

Hi everyone!

Just a few minutes to post and then I have to head home.

H has tried the past few weeks to be what he thinks is a better person. I haven't been able to show him any affection, attention, love....nothing. Every time the talk of D or separation comes up he gets angry & calls me nasty things. It came up last night when I told him that I just can't give him what he wants. I just can't leave behind what he's done. Keep in mind, the affair and the treatment of me.....not the first time. He's doing everything he can to use D5 against me. Making this my fault. Saying that it's now my fault because I'm the one who isn't trying. Telling me that if we just went to counseling....etc. I just can't find the strength to give him anything he wants and I told him that. I told him that he made me feel like a worthless piece of crap and it's taken me a very long time to get over that but I now realize that I'm worth a lot more and no one should ever treat me that way. I told him that I did try and that each and every time he gave me any hope he turned around and pulled the rug out from under me. I told him that I even gave him another chance back in August and what did he do.....he hurt me.

He's emailed me a few times during the day saying tha I'm getting what I wanted....to be a single Mom. Telling me that I'll never make it here in the "big city" on my own and that I better high tail it back to my parent's if I expect to make it. Telling me again that he'll only send money if he has something extra.

I got on a job search today that I had set him up on. I saw that when he was home for lunch he was looking for jobs back by his dad's. This is a step further than he's taken it before. I either see him moving out while we're at my parent's for Thanksgiving or he'll keep holding on for something.

Saffie....he is on the lease. Legally, I could have him removed though.

Need to go.

Hugs- Sue

[saffie]

Sue,

As well you know, he is trying to intimidate you as he is running scared.

You OTOH sound really good. High five!!

((((((hugs)))))

Oh....and get him off the lease.........

[dday101798]

Heh,

sounds all too familiar. My XW has tried to "patch" things up for whatever her motive may be, but each and everytime she goes down the path of pointing fingers and tossing accusations and pushes me further and further away. My stance is that I no longer have anything to lose by not speaking with her and going down that pointless path with her. If she wants to make amends, again for whatever reason, she needs to lose her hate, anger and angst against me that she still proclaims is valid for her to run off with someone else and destroy our children's lives. Until that mood changes, to me she's just screaming "why did you drop the net, you're supposed to catch me!', and I'll have no part of it. Sounds like your H is in the same boat.

[Yoyowife]

Sue,
Your H is draining you. I'm so proud of you standing up to him. It's time for Sue to reclaim her life and happines. Things will get much better.

Hugs

[NoCodeBlues]

Happy Thanksgiving, Sue.

[saffie]

^^^^ bump.

How is it going Sue?

[Puppy Dog Tails]

And ((((poof!)))) . . . she's gone again.

Puppy