feel like giving up - talk to me!

[brownidmom]

(((bid)))

that made me cry...to think is it true? do I really love a person who treats me this way?

Sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry. But I understand, sometimes when it is written for you in black and white, the things you don't like to admit to yourself, it is overwhelming.

I need to stop thinking for a bit. I spend all my time trying to be a better person and my H doesn't even take a moment to think what I'm going through. He's at work and doesn't give me a minute of his time. I'm dumb.

No, no, no! You are not dumb!!!! As Gnosis said a few posts back, you are a strong, moral, and loving woman. You are all those things! It is just that we think that by being better, we can make them change their minds. It just isn't that easy, hon.

No matter how much we cater, no matter how much we mind our p's and q's, no matter how clean we keep the house, fix the best meals, be the best parent we can be, how much we take care of ourselves- it won't change them. They have to be the ones who want to change and we have to learn to accept that fact, hard as it may be.

While I, and the rest of these great folks on the board, are no substitution for what you are seeking in your marriage, we do get it and will be here if you need us.

I am so sorry for you because I know exactly what you are going through. But please don't allow yourself to fall into the trap of feeling sorry for yourself. Believe me, been there and done that. It will only make things worse.

You should have some free time during the day to get out and do something you enjoy. Find something you like to do and make a standing date with yourself every week to do it. It should make the times at home a bit easier since your outlook will be improved from just having some fun.

(((((Luv)))))

bim