Spouse Suffering From Depression

[Lucky11too]

Good news is that he went yesterday! Yay! =) Bad news is that he definitely is pulling back from me again. I imagine the background interview was pretty intense (1 1/2 hours!) and probably brought up a lot of bad emotions regarding us. After his appointment, I texted him to ask how it went. I just got back an "ok". Then I asked him if he was gonna go to sleep (he was up early after working the night shift) or if he wanted to grab a bite to eat. He replies "sleepy". So, I just let it go. I'm sure the whole experience was a little overwhelming. Anyways, he ended up going to his parents house to see S, which is a good given the other options he could have chosen. He really seems to be repairing that broken relationship with his mom. They were always were close but since his depression hit, their R had been completely destroyed. I asked his mom how he was since he really didn't say much to me, but she said he didn't really talk about it to her either, but did say that he said he was going to another appointment today (yay!). Also, interesting to note, he posted on his facebook yesterday "Actions do speak louder than words". Since he seemed a little down yesterday, I'm assuming it's a negative statement, but I really don't know what it means and who it applies to? If anything, he should realize all the time, effort, and love I put in to getting all the appointments set up, papers filled out, etc. I haven't once said "I love you" in months, but I've definitely showed it. Hopefully he'll figure that out one day, but I can't push it. And I can't pretend to read his mind, so got to let it go...

I really hope this means good things for us and a positive change for the future. But no matter what, the most important thing has always been to me for H to get help so he can be a better father to S, and with the hope that in turn, we can become a family again. He's going to get the results, but it's still going to be up to him to decide what he's going to do about it...and he said he's still against medication. Hopefully he'll reconsider, b/c I believe he could really benefit from meds. I think I will just have to let him deal with the emotions he is feeling right now on his own though, and if he does turn and open up to me, just be there to support him. I wish I could do more now, but I can't push it. I just really hope he includes me in when he gets the results next week. I am excited, scared, and hopeful...